As kids, Sarah was my idol. I wanted to do everything she did, which I’m sure was pretty annoying at times. But she also made plenty of time to play dress up with me. I was extremely jealous of her long black hair and begged my mom to let me dye mine to match. Thankfully she never let me.

Last weekend my family held a 90th birthday celebration for my grandmother, or Grammy, out in Texas. Vlad and I were supposed to be there, but a snowstorm in New York had other plans.

Shine Theory was coined by Ann Friedman and Aminatou Sow, the hosts of one of my favorite podcasts, Call Your Girlfriend. The idea is that women can fight back against the trap of negatively comparing ourselves to other women by actively surrounding ourselves with awesome, impressive ladies. This is a source of strength, not point of weakness that invites negative comparisons.